What are YOUR november hoop practice goals?

What a powerful question! How do we get "there" if we don't know where we are going?

I realize I have been on a hooping freight train for months with non-stop performances, classes, rehersals and travel -- but my play time has virtually disappeared. This "play" time is the no-agenda hooping that happens when I am just taking "me" time to enjoy myself.

Hooping play time is PASSION time. It is when I hoop with no exact goal except to remember the feeling of gratitude in my body. It is when I let go of the incessant chatter of the mind and sink into the "now", the moment, the breathe. I can just focus on feeling, shaking my whole body and being like a kid. It is a shift for me from riding the freight train to riding the SOUL train!

Interesting... sometimes I walk into a rehersal with an agenda. "I will MASTER this move. I will DISCOVER this move I have never done, " I think to myself. I often leave those sessions feeling a bit let down.

New moves and unusual combinations are like precious gems which present themselves when I make space inside to welcome them. I have to slow down, let go of any need to aquire. First comes the feeling of connection, the gratitude, and then oftentime, a gem or two will roll into my lap! Just like in, "Excuse me, Your Life is Waiting," the feeling good happens of joy and wellbeing, then suddenly like a magnet that draws even more goodness in.

I need this play time. There have been times recently where I have wrestled with emotions which have been difficult. Judgement, competativeness, and impatience. The hardest part about them is that I was pushing these feelings down and judging myself as "bad" that I was even feeling these things! I felt ashamed and angry with myself and it created a cycle of negativity with no way out.

While wrestling with these difficult emotions yesterday, I picked up a copy of, "Start Where You Are" by Pema Chodron, an American Buddhist nun. I opened to the first page. It read, "This book is about awakening the heart." I sighed, closed the book and nodded by head. I opened it and read the first sentence again. The same feeling of "yes, read this!" came over me. I read the second sentence. "If you have ever wondered how to awaken your genuine compassionate heart, this book will serve as a guide." SOLD!

I'm a huge fan of Pema's, having listened to many of her books on audiotape while taking long drives. I hear her share ideas and think, "a-ha! yes, of course"... then months go by, I get caught up in the world, and forget. So I'm going inward for a while. I need to remember that feelings are like dreams which pass through consciousness and then are gone. Spending time judging them holds onto them as if they were real.

While I have my play time every day this month, I will feel into my heart. I'll just feel good, breathe deep and have fun. I'll make appointments with myself that are as important as any appointment I would make - I'll be on time, I'll show up ready to give myself all my love and attention. I'll be patient and generous with myself. I'll provide support with water and sunblock. If I need a break, I'll take one. I'll talk myself through anything that challenges me and remind myself to just enjoy the time. if I have thoughts that are difficult, I will let them pass through me like dreams that are not real. I'll listen to my body and respond with action. I'll let go and loosen up and smile. After all, what do we have to give to others, if we can't give it to ourselves?

Source of all That Is, thank you for sending people and experiences into my life which remind me to have a compassionate heart. I am so glad to live my life and experience lightening up and feeling more peace. Every day which passes, I feel more open minded, easygoing and joyful. Feeling good rushes over my whole being at a level I have never before experienced! I am amazed and in awe of how spectacular life can be! I shower my own precious heart with love and compassion, letting feelings pass through as dreams. I know that I AM beyond any feelings or emotions. I am a being of light and my role is is to shine brightly with the power of feeling good. Thank you for all the wonderful goodness which is coming to me!! Thank you for the gift of being alive and all the gifts of family and friends who surround me!